The Power of Releasing Judgment

The Power of Releasing Judgment

The Power of Releasing Judgment

Four years ago this book I co-authored was published (released Mar 15, 2016). A couple of weeks ago, I was reminded of the book after hearing about another celebrity who had committed suicide after being judged in media.

I’m by no means an expert on the subject of suicide but I do know what it feels like to lose hope and I also know that judgment kills.

Judgment is all around us, now more than ever, turn on the news or go online, more time is spent on bullying than empowering people which I find totally insane. 

It’s so easy to pass judgment on other people’s behaviors instead of creating your own life. Many choose to remove themselves as a result of that, whether by suicide, isolation, drugs, and other ways. 

When you follow your inner awareness and focus on your creations, doing work you love, having fun, and being with people you enjoy hanging with you don’t really have time to focus on what other people do, or don’t do.

We all make mistakes

When you’re in the public eye you get judged harshly, for some, one mistake and you’re out.

It could be as simple as speaking up and offering a different point of view or being human and doing something many of us have done without being on camera.

I’m talking about the individuals who have a desire to spread love and make this planet a better place. Think of all the talented musicians we’ve lost over the years for one.

Listening to negative press creates nothing good for anyone. Follow your own awareness and truth.

Those of us labeled as sensitive souls feel the pain of the world and for some of us, it gets to be too much as we tend to judge ourselves more harshly than anyone else could.

Why do some adults feel that it’s OK to bully? Could it be that the bullies are just so miserable that they need to project their pain on others instead of dealing with it?

All I can say on this topic is —STOP IT

Get a life and create a life that inspires!

Start with being grateful for what you have, every day. Seek help if needed and consider for a moment what legacy you want to leave behind and let that guide you.

The book “The power of releasing judgment” was a really interesting experience, we were 27 authors, each writing a chapter on our take of the topic at the time and we all offer many different tools to deal with this topic.

Many insights followed after writing this chapter for me personally I would’ve dealt with the situations differently today and that’s what growth is all about. We get insights and do the best we can with the information at hand at that moment.

It may not be an easy read for some, given the subject you may want to read a chapter that interests you and then sit with it before reading another one. You will be left with insights and suggestions on actions you can take.

Always follow your inner guidance.

What can you create instead?

Looking at judgment from a different perspective is why we wrote the book.

Judgment creates nothing good unless you’re willing to speak up, take action and show that there’s another option available.

When you believe the projections and beliefs of other people it’s easy to get stuck in that space, especially if you starting judging yourself.

We all have a choice in how we respond and when people project stuff at you it’s often more about them than you.

Use common sense

As I’m writing this we’re in the midst of a pandemic with many POVs blended with facts and various decisions that will impact us all on many levels globally.

Even here it’s about using common sense, listening to your inner guidance, washing your hands and staying home if you’re sick, feeling hesitant whether you should go or not, or have a compromised immune system.

Connect with your customers, friends, and neighbors and see if you can be of assistance if you get stir crazy sitting at home. Email, text, call or use Zoom and similar platforms to connect.

You can also use this time to tune within, meditate, clean your house literally (clear out closets and cabinets, organize your space to your liking), maybe cook something new?

Take action on what you can do right now and plan ahead for all the action items you can take once the quarantine period is over.

It’s OK to have POVs, judging why and buying into fears keeps you stuck so do your best to focus on what you CAN do.

What can you create today that will light your spirit up? Who can you connect with that would love to hear from you?

Sending you all good vibes, love & light.

CliftonStrengths®: Strategic® – A big picture view

CliftonStrengths®: Strategic® – A big picture view

Characteristics of the CliftonStrengths® Strategic® Talent Theme

For many of us with the CliftonStrengths® Talent Theme of Strategic®, the questions “What if?” or “What’s next?” often goes through our minds, sometimes so fast that we don’t even pay attention to it ourselves.

Another trait is the ability to quickly identify items that stand out when looking at the big picture. It could be seeing irregularities in patterns, missing pieces, a color, or simply connecting the dots and seeing the similarities between different teachings.

What stands out in the picture above for you? What thoughts pop into your head by just looking at this picture?

It could be as simple and immediate as coming to an unexpected road closure and quickly finding an alternate route, or simply having the awareness of taking an alternative route from the get-go. Maybe you’re seeing possibilities when others don’t? Many of us with this theme quickly sort out the path or alternatives, zooming in and out of the big picture view with ease. Do you recognize this in you?

Are there things that stand out like a sore thumb that you tend to address quickly, leaving people around you wondering what just happened? (or maybe that’s just my #5 theme of Activator® influencing?)

Considerations

The one thing those of us with the Strategic® talent theme need to consider is that for people around us, our actions may occur as if we’re winging it. We process different options in our head so fast and don’t normally explain how and why we arrived at the chosen path.

For many of us, it’s an intuitive theme. Added to that we love trying new things and have no problems making mid-course corrections as our focus is to find the best path forward. To keep those around us that are affected by our choices in the loop, we may need to consider sharing our thinking along the way.

As with all CliftonStrengths® themes, the way a theme comes across or is experienced by the individual varies for a number of reasons, 1) Your other dominant talents 2) How strong the talent is for you, i.e. where it falls in the ranking of your overall strengths? 3) If it’s a talent or a strength that you use daily, or not? and 4) how this theme influences how you view your life?

Added to this is the layer of the builder talent role you bring (BP10™ Assessment), and of course your trade skills and experiences.

Combining CliftonStrengths® with BP10™

What I found super interesting, after talking with a fellow coach, Jeff @ Prism Perspective Coaching, is, again, how different each role shows up for each individual. For example, for me, by just looking at my role of Conductor, and with the Relationship talent as my #1 (BP10™) together with my #1 CliftonStrengths® talent of Strategic, my focus is on WHO and PEOPLE. This means that people stand out for me over processes and that includes traffic or navigating crowds with ease. While a variety of things will stand out for me, it tends to be the impact on people that stir my pot and get me in action.  For someone else, with Strategic, it could be and often is, something completely different.

Do you have Strategic® as one of your dominant talents? How does it play out for you? Please comment below, I’d love to know.

Are you curious what your talents might be? CLICK HERE for more information about the CliftonStrengths® Assessment or HERE for the BP10™ Assessment.

Lastly, visit Gallup’s YouTube channel for more information on the CliftonStrengths® theme of Strategic® HERE.

Turning Talents into Strengths

Turning Talents into Strengths

Today I’m super stoked to announce the launch of a new collaborative book, written with a dozen other Gallup-certified Strengths Coaches! Inside, we tell our stories of how our lives have been changed, and how coaching conversations have changed the lives of others.

Grab your Kindle copy of Turning Talents into Strengths: Stories of Coaching Transformation right now for only $3.99.

Here’s an excerpt from my chapter: “When you read your Strengths Insight Report from the CliftonStrengths® Center you will get present to your greatest potential. Everyone I’ve coached or spoken with so far all say, “Yep, that’s so me,” after reading it. You’ll also discover the gaps of what could be keeping you from reaching it.  A Strengths coach can stand in the gap and act as a bridge for you. It’s so much faster to have a coach guide you in the process of stepping into your greatness and owning it fully. Walking people through this process and seeing the confidence, engagement and gratitude for who they are is amazing to witness, and the epiphany of why people don’t always “get” us. It’s a process, to embrace your greatness.

I’ve found that you can shift someone’s life and experience of themselves quickly. With a working knowledge of the Strengths tools, you can move forward in anything that you do! Of course, to sustain change, you need to use the tools and be in action.” —Pia Jansson

CLICK HERE to get your Kindle copy!

A big thank you goes out to our compiler and editor extraordinaire Mrs. Rhonda Knight Boyle.

#talentsintostrengths #coachingstories #strengthscoach + #CliftonStrengths and #StrengthsFinder

What narrative are you buying?

What narrative are you buying?

I listened to a podcast the other week that reminded me of the concept of narratives aka “what are you focusing on?” In this case, the topic was around news and how many choose the negativity that much of the news today is focusing on.

The choice to focus on the tragedies and what’s “wrong & bad” in our communities instead of all the great things that are created every day is something that has always bugged me and one reason I avoid diving any deeper than the occasional headline. It’s not about putting the head in the sand it’s simply a choice to create a narrative that empowers me. We all have 24 hrs and how we choose to spend them creates an energy and experience that affects not only us but the people around us and ultimately who we attract into our reality. Do you focus on creating a life & business that inspires you or on conditions that leave you feeling disempowered?

The guest on this particular podcast, Branden Harvey, started a good newspaper (bravo!) to counter all the negative news he saw that conflicted with his experiences while traveling around the world. We all have different passions and interests, and within each topic, there are many narratives created, which one are you choosing? I know for me, I’d rather help one person step into their best selves that is ready for it, than focusing on someone who is not open to listen or change.

When you create a new business, sales region or simply circles of friends or co-workers that you hang with, do they inspire you to be your best? What if that is how we can create change in this world? One person at the time, being our best and then spreading that knowledge/energy to the people we interact with? For some of us it’ll literally be one person at the time, for others it will be a team or a stadium filled with people.

A smile goes a long way, and when we are working in environments that feed us, that smile comes easy and people tend to produce a lot more when having fun. I’ve experienced both sides a multitude of times and it’s an interesting dynamic to be in. I’ve found over the years that what energizes me is to contribute to people that are looking for help, and when I’m around people that are only focusing on the numbers, stats or results without looking at what’s going on with the person, they’re kind of missing the boat.

It starts with us, as individuals, leaders, business owners or employees, and the choices we make every day. In business, we all have a “boss” whether it’s a client, board, investors, management team, to consider. For a fast change, the leadership ideally understands the need to develop and support their employees in empowering ways, starting with each individual at the top. We all know that that doesn’t always happen so another option could be a team initiating that change, and with positive change, people tend to listen, and maybe “want what they have” and spread a demand of change by leading by example.

And then there are the companies that choose to do nothing and often end up as statistics. What happens to the people that work hard when they lose any hope for change? Do they stay or do they leave? How does that impact the company?

In my experience, there’s a mix, some see the writing on the wall and leave quickly others toughen it out as they don’t see another option and are the last to leave. Change happens around us all the time and with that, it impacts most businesses. When you as a leader don’t listen to your people you’re signaling that you don’t care, while wondering why performance levels aren’t where you would like them to be. What actions can you take to shift the vibe? Who do you want to be known as? What would be fun and empowering for you?

In this era of public bullying, we all have a choice on the narratives we listen and partake in, are you spreading joy, more negativity or creating another scenario? For all the “bad” things happening, what if there are more “good” created every day by dedicated people that care? Why not tune into those stories? If the masses stopped supporting the “negative” news and supported “good news” channels, would that by any chance shift things? And either way, what if you focused on what made you feel great? What narrative are you creating?

What is one action you can take today that could brighten someone else’s reality? (never underestimate the power of a smile or hello!). What do you think about the news? Do you listen to it? Does it empower you? Comment below, I’d love to know.

CLICK HERE to listen to the podcast.